Newsletter

February 2011 Newsletter

Heart Transplant by Pat Harley

I didn't love her. I mean she was so...bossy! Truly I didn't even like her. Actually I could hardly be in the same room with her. Unfortunately I had no choice. The church had just formed small groups according to geographical location and she just happened to be in my geographical area. She also served on a committee I was on. I thought of moving. I even thought of changing churches but then Beloved would not hear of it and besides, I loved the church I was in.

That was in 1980. I was a new Christian and just getting my bearings. God had shown me a lot about Himself and about His laws and His activity in the hearts of man. But then I also had bought into the lie that God wanted me to be happy and that came by giving me my way! And SHE was not "my way" in fact she was "in my way" to happiness.

I would be at committee meeting and leave angry. I would attend our small group and leave mad. She would call me on the phone (before caller ID or at least I could have avoided this!) and I would hang up irritated.

Now these weren't the only feelings I had. I felt guilty. Especially when I read about how serious (I mean REALLY serious) God was about us loving one another. I didn't seem to have trouble with most every one else in the world but for some reason I would just garner up enough good will toward my nemesis and then, BOOM...as soon as I was with her all of the old feeling would pour forth.

Truly it is a terrible way to live. The problem is anger can and does consume the heart and soul. So I decided to take matters into my own hands and I WOULD love her no matter WHAT even if it killed me. But for all of my good intentions, I failed over and over again. So at last I just gave up. It was what it was!

God can be a demanding task master especially when sin is devouring His children...and it was eating me alive. And so at last I asked for help. I asked God to love her through me. What took place over the next few months was nothing less than a heart transplant. No, she didn't change. I did! I began to see her strengths and how very much she brought to the table. And then one day we met in her home for small group. She had a platter of cookies. And as I stood in her kitchen, a cookie in each hand, I felt genuine love for her.

Well I got the recipe for those cookies and I make them often. They are called Judy's Cookies" and every time I make them I think of Judy, and love and a miracle that took place almost thirty years ago.

Soon after my heart-change, God moved them away to the other side of the country. I miss her.